Fake Review: Noughts & Crosses – Malorie Blackman.

Synopsis from Goodreads.

Sephy and Callum have been best friends since childhood, and now they are older and they realise they want more from each other. But the harsh realities of lives lived in a segregated society are beginning to take their toll: Callum is a nought–a second-class citizen in a world dominated by the Crosses–and Sephy is a Cross, and the daughter of one of the most powerful men in the country. The barriers they would have to cross to be together at first seem little more than minor obstacles to the two idealistic teenagers, but soon those barriers threaten not only their friendship but their lives.



You expect me to review this book? Me? You’re surely new here. My reviews are… and this book is…
OK fine.

Let’s see.

Well, for a start, I can’t say anything about the plot. I read this book not knowing anything more than what the synopsis told me and that is the best way to go into this book. The only thing you need to know about the plot is that it has one. And it’s absolutely outstanding.

This book is so powerful and completely unforgettable. The writing is magnificent. The world-building is incredible. And the characters and the relationships between them are some of the most brilliantly constructed ones that I have ever read.

And the plot twists… I can’t stop thinking about them. I honestly can’t remember another book I have recently that has given me the gut-wrenching “No…no….no, they’re not going to do that. They won’t. Will they? They can’t. Can they?’ feeling that this book gave me. I never saw it coming and I still don’t want to believe. Actually, I refuse to believe it.


So there, Ms Blackman.

I’m not doing a very good job here, am I?
Are you convinced yet?

Please just say yes and put me out of my misery so I can stop writing this review. I’m trying to be coherent and make intelligent observations but it’s difficult to make coherent and intelligent observations when all I want to do when I think of this book is sob into a chocolate cake.
Yep, that’s right. I don’t want to even eat the chocolate cake. I want to sob into it.

I still have the dodgy sunburn marks I gained from sitting in the garden on the weekend Manchester was hotter than Hawaii because I was so engrossed by this book.

So yeah, you expected me to write a review for this book. I can’t.

I pass.

In an incredibly long-winded way, of course. Hey, you wouldn’t want it any other way, would you?
But, I officially pass on reviewing this book.

Why Malorie Blackman isn’t the name on everyone’s lips, I don’t know. Read this book and then come and talk to me. You bring the gin and I’ll bring the sun cream.

4 thoughts on “Fake Review: Noughts & Crosses – Malorie Blackman.

  1. *hugs Jo* It turns out your fake reviews are just as good as your real reviews, Lady Jo! I’m sure I’ve heard of this but I know nothing about it and I’m going to leave it that way until I can get a copy!

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